Its a known fact that we all need to take breaks, for the sake of maintaining our sanity.

whether they are tea or coffee breaks, break from continuous classes, or break from working non stop.

If you notice we often find women saying ‘I need a break,‘ and especially those, ‘Stay-at-home-mums’,

I myself say the phrase at least once in a week.

So, what do we mean when we say…we need a break?

Are we trying to run away from our responsibilities? we don’t love or care much about our children or, are we plain bored?

Actually, we get so much involved in taking care of our family’s needs, putting their needs first rather than our own that we sometimes even forget we actually exist.

I still remember once when I was asked about my favorite food, and i was unable to answer that instantly..and I swear, I had to think hard, as I am so habitual of cooking what my husband, and particularly what my kids love to eat

Once you get married and have babies,your life basically revolves around what kids love to eat, what kids want to do for the weekend, what movies are good to watch with kids, its kids who get to decide where they want to eat on weekends, where they want to hang out.

It’s like one day you finally wake up and realize that you have lost the person that you knew once(that’s you), the person you have become now is dull and boring, who doesn’t know the meaning of having fun.

You forget the things you liked doing once, you don’t call your friends anymore, neither do you return their calls, you never think about having a good time without having your children around.

You frown more than you smile. You are always having those panic attacks.

Many people agree that it’s good for mothers to take a break from  time to time, from their daily hectic routines, that can help them feel better emotionally as well as physically.

The moment mothers get up from the bed, their mind is focused only on, how to get the daily chores done which includes cooking, cleaning, washing, changing a baby’s diaper and not to mention, how to handle those tantrums of children which they keep on throwing from time to time, without any prior warning.

All this leaves women physically exhausted, mentally drained and not to mention frustrated,  they miss having their ‘me time’ (time alone) it’s at that point they freak out and scream ‘I need a break’.

It’s even more exhausting for mothers, who stay at home because their lives revolve around children all the time, and they think they are not even appreciated for the fact that, how efficiently they are running their households as well as looking after their children.

They feel they are being taken for granted, and it’s their responsibility only to do everything all by themselves, without husbands doing their share because they choose to stay at home mom over working mom.

Many of us even think ‘Being a housewife is such a thankless job, one that doesnt come with any perks.’

Just because stay-at-home-mums are not bringing home any money they are never appreciated for what they have to put up with.

They feel they are being taken for granted, and  it’s their responsibility only to do everything all by themselves, without husbands doing their share because they  choose to stay at home mom over working mom.

Also read: 7 Fun things to do with your kids this summer

21 Signs you are in dire need of a break

  1. You are always cranky and in a bad mood
  2. The thought of kids having vacations and staying home drives you insane.
  3. You want to escape to lala land and never come back
  4. You often take refuge in washrooms
  5. You start eating increasing amount of comfort food
  6. You start comparing your life with other friends
  7. Nothing excites you or makes you happy anymore
  8. As time passes your to-do-list is increasing
  9. you don’t like taking care of your needs
  10. all you ever want to do is stay in your bed wearing pj’as
  11. Most of the times you feel guilty for not being a good mother
  12. You feel helpless and at the verge of crying most of the times
  13. People actually have to remind you to smile
  14. You survive on caffeine
  15. You don’t call your friends fearing you’d have to listen to their adventure stories
  16. You put milk in the cupboard and cereal in a fridge
  17. sometimes you even put your cell phone in a  fridge and spend whole day looking for it.
  18. You let a sigh of relief as soon as your kids leave for school.
  19. You feel like going for vacations every week.
  20. You hide the last piece of chocolate only to eat in the privacy of your washroom.
  21. You miss being unmarried.

Can you identify the above signs? If yes, then you are in a dire need of a break.

Now as we have concluded that we all need a break from our hectic routines, now lets analyze how can we actually achieve that.

Tips for mothers who need a break

Plan a quiet date with yourself

Well, why not? Whoever said the date has to be with your better half or with a friend only? One can always enjoy the quiet time with a nice coffee, a book in a nice environment.

Take a chill pill

So what if your home isn’t as tidy as your friend’s? but darling she has a husband who doesn’t mind doing the dishes and if needed can even mop the floor, change diapers, keep an eye on kids while she blow dry her hair perfectly and not to mention she has a team of helpers.

So, you see there’s no comparison between you and your friend, even if you tried your home can’t be as spotless as hers so take a chill pill and don’t let such petty issues bother you.

Make most of the time when your child is in school

Try to take advantage of the time when your child is in school.

I don’t care if you take a nap, watch Sex and the city, take a log shower, eat a hearty breakfast, have a chat with a friend on phone, neither will I judge you for the things you do to keep yourself happy.

The idea is to pamper yourself when your child is gone to school so that when your child comes back home, he/she finds a whole lot healthier and happier mama.

Try to Plan everything in advance no sudden change of plans

In order to avoid chaos, try to plan every night in advance.

For example, plan overnight what has to be cooked for the next day’s lunch and dinner.

Make a list of chores that have to be done for the other day, even kids activities and lessons that they have to reinforce should be priory planned, that include trips to the parks and grocery stores, no sudden plans.

It may be overwhelming in the beginning but gradually you will find how proper planning and schedule will make your life easy.

Keep a calendar in your access at all times, mark your important dates for example, a dentist’s appointment, your kid’s PTM, or exams dates.

Also keep a personal diary in your purse where each day’s plan is written.

Have a hobby to make yourself feel good

Try to indulge in a hobby that relax your mind and make you feel good. It could be anything from reading a book, or getting enrolled in a Zumba class. The Key is to find a hobby that relax your mind by taking your mind off the stressful routine.

Connect with friends and learn how they deal with stress

Its very important to catch up with your friends once in a while. Try to connect with them and learn how they are managing their lives, how did they struggle if they happen to be successful in their careers. To learn is to grow, and when you meet people you always learn new things.

Go for a walk

Go for a quiet walk if you can manage even if its a 15 minute walk in your backyard or garden. Being in a fresh air can do wonders for your mind and you will be more energetic.

Find a way to DE-stress yourself

There has to be a way to de-stress yourself. We all have stress in our lives but nobody should go to sleep worrying. You have to find a way to destress before it accumulates and explodes one day. It can be kick boxing, a dance class, even a brisk walk can help. There has to be a way to take out the frustration that’s building inside you

Ask for support if you can

If you have a good support system then you are truly blessed. If not, you can still ask your sister/brother, mother, mother in law or even an old friend to support you by keeping your kids with them, while you can have a movie night or a quiet dinner with your husband.

Its a best opportunity when you two can actually talk with each other without being interrupted or fearing kids might over hear you.

No you don’t have to feel guilty for asking someone else, that’s other than you to take responsibility  of your kids for a little while. It doesn’t make you mean it actually makes you a smart mummy.

In the end, I would just say, we are humans and not machines, who can work nonstop without taking a break, hell , even machines need to be stopped too after some time.

We need a break to have some time alone to think straight, to ponder over our mistakes, to figure out what went wrong and to finish that book that has been lying on a shelf for quite some time, we want to take one of those long showers that can relax us….we just need some time to remember who we are.

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Hey!! I am Saima Masood. A passionate writer, daydreamer and a blogger, a procrastinator by nature + coffee lover. Food is one thing that makes me immensely happy.

8 COMMENTS

  1. Saima i dont agree with ur emphasis on stay at home moms for a break . I think workung women have double stress. Not only they hav to fulfill their job requirement as well as expectarions from husband n esp the kids r never ending

    • Ayesha bhabi,i am not saying that its not hectic for working women…. its even more hectic for them…what i meant was women who stay at home feel unappreciated for what they do, often husbands say(tum kerte kia ho ghar per he tu rehte ho sara din)..so in some cases, women who stay at home, envy working women for having their indentity and at least having a break for somtime..even if that means working outside.! thanks for commenting

    • u actually missed my point..i shared the feeling of what stay-at-home-mums feel..i am not making any comparision here

  2. After reading your article i feel like saying “hai merey dil ki awaz” Totally agree with everything that you’ve written….

    • I am glad you liked my article and found your dil ke awaz..thanks for visiting the blog and stay tuned for more interesting topics inshallaAllah.

  3. You wrote it very well according to your topic. I really do not tease my mother, Like i iron my clothes, get ready for university and go to kitchen to eat ….and pick everything by my own…what do i need from her is washed clothes plus cooked food…..What i need the most is my mom presence …when i see her, i really feel relaxed and just her one hug makes me smile and satisfied…

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